Adulthood is Ryan's Time

Good morning everyone,

Ryan's Very Special Arts choir concert went well last Sunday. Here he is in his role as sign person. My camera took some pretty blurry shots. I have autofocus and I think something is wrong with it. Nuts!

The concert was lovely. The participants all looked happy and thrilled to be there. The audience was attentive and appreciative.

Directly afterwards Ryan had a Thanksgiving Feast with Best Buddies. The college buddies provided everything and did an amazing job. All in all a very busy day with church in the morning as well.

Adulthood has really been Ryan's time to shine. When our kids are children it's all about compliance. When they're adults the beauty of their uniqueness shines. They are able to choose what they want to do and their natural abilities emerge, in spite of their disabilities.

If you have a child with special needs and you are frustrated, don't despair. While I don't want you to wish away your special someone's childhood, just know that better days may be coming.

God bless you and yours,
Much love and joy,
Karen

Happy Thanksgiving!

Hello everyone,

Each Thanksgiving is a little more poignant than the last. I remember the doctors telling me that Ryan might not ever walk, ever talk, or ever know me.

Each Thanksgiving is a heartfelt thanks that Ryan does know me. I think all our kids do, no matter what kind of limitations they have on their earthly bodies, their hearts are true. They know and love us. We see it. We know we see it, even if they never walk, never talk, or seem like they don't know us. They do. That's all their is to it. They know us, love us and each time we walk into a room, their heart thanks us. Just like our heart thanks them for entering into our lives. When we are with them, it's all okay.

God bless your day and have a great Thanksgiving feast next week.

Much love and joy,

Karen



Give me antibiotics!

Hello everyone,

I've missed blogging but my weeks have been slipping by without a chance to talk with you. Not only is work nuts but it seems like most falls, chaotic.

Well, here's the mess in the house. I'm redoing the kitchen. Actually, I'm not doing it. I have a carpenter/painter named Kevin who did the bathroom. The floor is done, it's Duro-ceramic and I love it. It looks like terrazzo. I'll keep you posted with pics if you're interested. If not, just slide on by.

My house is about 50 years old so the kitchen is small. It's an eat-in kitchen but there's not a ton of space. The whole level is only about 1000 square feet. Big enough for Ryan, me and the dog, right?

Ryan loves the entire process which really surprises me. I thought the disarray would derail him but he's chugging along nicely. I'm the one tearing my hair out. Kevin is amazing about keeping the kitchen functional while he works but just having the cupboard doors off drives me a little bonkers. Everything looks so messy. A couple more weeks at the most and it'll be done. My countertop comes in next week.

Ryan's natural curiosity overrides his aversion to disorder when we take on a project like this and he's got his little nose in every step of the project. I'm glad though. What a nightmare if he didn't. He spends a lot of time in his room, however, perhaps a way of coping.

Ryan's cough is still hanging on. He got soooo sick about two weeks ago and is still suffering from a lingering bronchitis. I guess I'll have to take him in this week if it doesn't break up more. I'm a little concerned about it. His coughs sometimes don't resolve without antibiotics. URIs have been a part of his life since he was born. Sometimes I really have to fight to get them and that ticks me off. Healthy kids recover in a couple of weeks but a child with disabilities and upper respiratory infections his entire life is not really where a doctor should make a point. Sheesh. Give me a break dude. I've given it plenty of time to resolve. On Tuesday it will be THREE weeks and we're heading in. I think too many people take their kids in during that first week so doctors put them off. We're not like that and I would hope that over the years, that would become obvious.

Wish me luck friends. It's life on the exceptional side, am I right?
Take care!
Much love and joy,
Karen

ps. Check my website at www.casparapublishing.com to see when Children of Light is out. It should be sometime in December.

Our Puppy Poppie is Feeling Poorly.

Poppie is not feeling well tonight and we're so sad. For a while she was shaking so hard I thought she was having seizures. Our last dog, Ginger, had seizures before she died and I couldn't help but think of that.

We get so attached to our pets, don't we?

I finally got three baby aspirin down her by putting them in Lil Smokies. I think that's helped a bit. Why does this stuff always happen when the vet is closed.

It's not like when Dr. Flynn was around. He was a farm vet that you could call day or night, there weren't a lot of extra charges for the odd hours of the call. Maybe we need a Pet Emergency Room. The city vets could rotate duty.

We have a crabby old man as a neighbor who is horribly vindictive. He got his tail in a knot this summer when we put up the privacy/safety fence for Ryan and I wouldn't put it past him to try to hurt Poppie. Last summer he threw a stuffed hedgehog with a firecracker over the chain link. The dog, of course, ran over to it. Fortunately, it fizzled out or it would have hurt her. He didn't think I saw but I was looking out the window at the time so saw the entire thing. I hope he wouldn't take out his anger issues on a harmless little dog in her own back yard. I'd like to believe that he isn't that twisted. I want to believe in the goodness of people.

When Ryan and I prayed for the dog this evening (yes, we prayed for the dog) I added a prayer for him. It must be horrible to be so angry and unhappy all the time. Can you imagine? Actually, I don't want to imagine.

So, when you go to sleep tonight or if you're reading this on Thursday morning, please pray for our pooch, Poppie. We love and we want her to feel better. Also please add a prayer for my neighbor who is so very unhappy and angry.

Remember, I'm praying for you too.
God bless,
Much love and joy,

Karen

You Matter!

Hi everyone,

How are you all doing?

I went to a conference on transition last week but I've already transitioned Ryan so a lot of it I knew. Actually, I didn't learn a thing, which was a bummer. Usually I can bring home something. However, Ryan wanted to go so I registered us. Keep in mind we went through all of this about three years ago.

Then at the last minute Ryan didn't feel well so I went alone to collect materials for him. I did collect some nice brochures and it was wonderful talking to parents and other professionals. I just kind of spent the morning networking. Then I didn't return in the afternoon, Ryan needed me.

I always feel so clueless and yet, when I go to these things, I am amazing at how much information I've gathered over the years. I ran into a couple of parents that were newbies and I hope I helped. Maybe that was God's plan for me being there. It was about someone else.

I'm always surprised by that too. We tend to think everything is about us and ours because we have to advocate so often. When we realize it isn't, that others are in a place we've already been ... that maybe we can help ... it;s even a little shocking. We do contribute. We are of value. What we do matters.

When you wake up and feel like you can't fight one more battle remember that. What we do ... matters. It matters to our children, it matters to other children with disabilities, it matters to some parent who is coming through the same crap after us. It matters.

So get up, take a deep breath, pick up your imaginary light saber and head out as the warrior you are. You are Wonder Woman. You are Xena Warrior Princess, you are a mom of a kid with disabilities. You rock!

Have a wonderful day. Be strong and fierce. I love you.
Karen