Whimsy and Wonder in Everyday Songs

It's deep summer and I love it! I heard my first locust buzzing today and the weather was absolutely beyond perfect! Crisp, clear, and sunny. Amazing!

I took a photo of our patio umbrella on Ryan's request, he loves lawn doo-da ... in quantity. It's gotten better as he's gotten older. Now he concentrates on dancing, musical stuffed animals. Trust me, you can't believe how many are out there!! We have dancing rabbits, an 18 inch chili pepper who sings "hot hot hot" and over a dozen others. They drive me crazy but I'm so thankful he can take enjoyment in them, I put up with their cacophony. He can run up to two or three at a time.

The other day at about 4:00 a.m. the birds sang a similar tune and it struck me that there is a dissonance in most of our lives that makes up the melody of each day. We only have to let it all blend together and wash over us to hear the peculiar songs that are the soundtrack to our lives.

I lament the sounds Ryan will never hear, but I'm glad he can hear me say "I love you." I grieve for the young man that might have been while I celebrate the young man he is. There is much joy and blessing in each day, each verse of this whimsical and wonderful song.

May God bless you and show you joy today in your child with special needs. Remember I'm praying for you.

Much love and joy,

Karen

Life is Good

This is a sign I have hanging inside my front door, so I see it every time I leave the house. I sell Stampin' Up! scrapbook and card making supplies on the side (and teach therapeutic scrapbooking) so I wanted to use some of the cool vinyl Decor Elements on the mirror. It took me about five minutes to lay these words down.

Each time I see it I remember that life really is good. I might have a child with disabilities, but he is the joy of my life. When we don't have to deal with the outside crap, life IS good. He maintains the wonder and joy that is part of childhood. He is polite and caring, a good young man. I'm proud of him. Growing up in his shoes hasn't been easy but he has persevered and found passions in his life.

I think that's the trick, having passions. Ryan loves music. Since he's profoundly hard of hearing and aided in both ears he is exceptionally grateful that he can hear it with today's technology. He's passionate about listening to many different kinds. His relative deafness makes him more aware of his other senses. He is extremely visual. Movies, with his FM system or closed captioning, are a huge hobby of his. From contemporary, like the Harry Potter movies, right down to vintage, like Bringing Up Baby with Cary Grant and Katherine Hepburn or the comedy of Laurel and Hardy he is enrapt.

We've just started to fish and Ryan loves that. He's passionate about beaches and parks so fishing, being a new hobby we're introducing, fits right in! He loves to hike and take photos. His pics are a little avant garde but hey, we all see the world differently from one another, don't we?

I have passions. I love to read and to write. Some of the hobbies I've introduced to Ryan are mine so that we enjoy them together.

Life is Good.

I pray for your happiness today. Your peace and your child with special needs.

Much love and joy,

Karen

Road Crossing Mommy Duck

Ryan and I went to dinner the other night and decided fast food in the park was just the ticket. We brought our cameras and took some shots of whatever we wanted. This one was one of mine, my zoom was a little out of focus. I love robins and this one stood so perfectly.

Then we saw ducks walking in a group in the shade of some enormous pine trees. It was so kooky looking.

The pine tree area was actually a circle surrounded by road. Sometimes, as parents of children with disabilities we can get trapped in a similar way, wandering with the other parents, doing the same things over and over.

In fact, we can quack pretty loudly when some duck crosses the road and ventures out with new ideas and plans. What will become of her chick? Suddenly the rest of the mommy ducks, after standing and watching to make sure the first mommy duck doesn't run in front of a truck, follow. They find a pier to swim under, duck weed to play in, cattails to hide behind ... a whole new world.

Don't be trapped into always going after the same old programs for your child. Be creative. You don't always have to follow the other mommys. Granted, at first it seems like we have to because we don't know what we're doing ... it's a new pond we're swimming in! Don't wait until you have it all under control to try something new. Things will never seem that under control and you won't branch out.

Strike out across the road and follow your heart. Others may laugh, but trust me ... speaking as a road crossing mommy duck ... eventually they follow. :-)  Try new things, develop new models. Be brave. Your heart knows what's best for your child. Listen to it.

God bless you and yours. I pray that God shows you his love in an amazing and concrete way today.

Much love and joy,

Karen

Where the Wild Things Are

When we went to Rice Lake the other day we stopped by the Bear Paw outfitters. Ryan wanted to look for fishing gear. They had a ton of stuffed wildlife including some African animals. I always feel a little sad when I look at them. They're so regal to suffer the indignity of adorning someones wall.

So the next day I took Ryan to see some live tigers at the zoo.

And I think I might have feel even sorrier for these animals. The picture doesn't show the sheer size of this cat. It was enormous with huge paws. Because it is native to Africa I have a different view of it than I did of the bobcat or the bear.

These are bobcats, and we have them in nearly every county in Wisconsin north of I-90. Yikes! The fact that they were caged just mean two less to be out in the wild near me. I feel the same way about bears.

When I lived in the country we had bears sleep across the road in the wild plum bushes. The dog and I would freak each morning they'd been there and some nights she wouldn't go out and I knew the bear was out there. When we moved to town I relaxed significantly, but we even get them in town sometimes, wandering around the clinic or somewhere else.

At any rate, we went from the zoo to the botanical garden-like farm market and wandered through their 27 greenhouses, then I felt more like myself. Ryan wanted more flowers for some pots on the patio and for his raised beds. He's really embracing this and even has a pair of cheap WalMart Croc-like shoes that he wears only for gardening. Too cute!

We planted more onion sets last evening but it was so mosquito-y outside we came in. I'll have to fog today if they're bad. I refuse to be driven indoors by them. We bought some of those OFF! clip on repellents. We haven't used them yet but when we do I'll let you know how they work.

Now I really am going to be late for church if I don't fly.

God bless you and yours,

Much love and joy,

Karen

Daylilies Abound!

My daylilies are blooming and they are gorgeous! I love perennials, so little work, so much color! They come back every year and look stunning. I also have black eyed Susans this year, Shasta daisies and some exotics.

Here is a pink and white exotic. We went to one of my fav greenhouses and they had tons of colors on sale. I wanted to buy them all. However, we were there for Ryan's horticultural beds and I decided to wait for my stuff until a different time. Maybe next summer after I'm off crutches.

The tiger lilies look like they'll bloom this weekend. Ryan was outside yesterday with me and weeding his little garden beds. I FINALLY talked him into leaving Happy outside in the garden (his little scarecrow). It's a testament to how much safer he feels back there. That privacy fence has been amazing for him.

I feel like Ryan and I can share the gardening, as well as him sharing with other people, it gives us a common love. He cleaned his first onion last night (I helped a little--sensory issues, you know?) and needs to plant more this weekend. He typically doesn't like onions but ate one last night because he picked it and cleaned it. His green beans are blooming and I can't wait to get all those vitamins in him! 

God bless you all. Have a great Saturday.

Much love and joy,

Karen

Horticultural Therapy Beds

Hi there and Happy Friday!

I realized I hadn't really shown you all good pictures of Ryan's horticultural beds. Here's a shot of the first one. He has marigolds on the end, three or four different types of tomatoes next to that, radishes, carrots and then green beans on the end.The beans are blooming and the tomatoes have little green fruit on them. He's thrilled!

This photo shows part of the first and second one. The second one is lower in profile. He has green onions on one end, then two cucumber hills and four rows of peas with marigolds on the end. We went out last night and started with weeding. Ryan picks one tiny weed at a time so I end up helping of course, but by the time it was done he'd spent a good half hour in the fresh air.

He lovingly watered his produce and then we picked a few of his onions. He must have asked me five times "Are you cleaning my onions?" or "Are those nice onions?" etc. It was precious! He kept coming into the kitchen and looking at them as though he couldn't quite believe he'd grown them. He called his grandmother and told her, he talked to his great aunt about it. He had stories to tell. I LOVE that about the horticultural therapy which has tons of physical, emotional and psychological benefits (I wrote an extensive article on it once for my column) but it has a social component. Ryan has a common language with other gardeners and farmers. It gives him a reason to pick up the phone and talk to family members. It's awesome on too many levels to go into here.

Strait-Edge Construction did the beds for us last fall. I recommend them for this type of job too. The stones are secured with pins so the beds don't start sagging or settling in a weird configuration. 

Today we're planting more onions and his second batch of radishes are up so we'll look at those. He also slept with his window open a couple of inches last night again because of the security fence! I didn't realize how much he worried about it until now. He sleeps better because of  the fresh air too. So many benefits from a simple fence and some gardening beds. Every day we discover more benefits!

That's it for me today,

Have a good one .... grill a hamburger for me tonight! 

Much love and joy,

Karen 

Photo Safaris

I love taking photos and this one of a wild flower is precious I think. The ditches are filled with wildflowers right now. Purple, yellow, white, orange and pink color the roadsides, making it look like the poppy fields in Oz.

Ryan and I take photo safaris. We love to grab our cameras and head out for an entire day. Sometimes we have a goal in mind and sometimes we just turn on whatever road we want to. We've spent time at Zoos, at parks, on bike trails ... on the side of the road. This one was taken at Beaver Creek. We spend a lot of time there.

I love digital photography because you can take multiple photos from different angles and then check them out when you get home.

Ryan has a good eye. I do therapeutic scrapbooking with him and the pics come in very handy. If you're interested, I also teach therapeutic scrapbooking to parents or caregivers of children with special needs. Let me know if you're interested.

Hope your day is awesome!

Much love and joy,

Karen

Our Obsession with Paddleboats

Ryan has been interested (read that obsessed) with the paddleboats of the Mississippi River since he was tiny ... The Mississippi Queen, the American Queen and various others.

Last summer, we got an invitation to have lunch on the LaCrosse Queen paddleboat. It was a fun trip and one that Ryan won't soon forget. We had to stay on the bottom deck however. Ryan managed to literally crawl up the stairs to the upper level but then I needed help to get him back down. He couldn't describe how he felt but I wonder if he had vertigo. When you combine height and motion for me, I do. Plus with the auditory things he has going on it wouldn't surprise me if vestibular issues were part of what was going on.

I ran into another mom I knew and she recommended going up top. When I told her why we wouldn't be trying that again she said, "Even A  (her kid) could do that!" This from a parent who has a child with disabilities. I wanted to smack her. Honestly! Ryan was right there!

At any rate, I digress. The lunch was fun and it was a sensory experience as we felt the vibrations of the wheel, the spray of the water and the wind in our face when we went outside. It's not a hotel Queen like the  others but LaCrosse Queen was written on the side so Ryan was a happy boy.

This is a shot of the Julia Belle Swain, another paddleboat on the Mississippi that was similar to the LaCrosse Queen. It's a little bigger I think. You can tell we took the photo from inside the boat as we rode.

Ryan has calmed down regarding the paddleboats, now that he's been on one. It's nice to move on to other fixations. .

Have a great day and boy, I hope the sun comes out soon!

Much love and joy,

Karen

Bobbing Along

This is a little hard to see but it's the bobber on my line while fishing. I took a picture because it reminded me of me.

Seems  like I ride low in the water too some days. Depending on what's going on I may get pulled under, or I maybe be dragged across the water. Parenting a child with special needs has days like that. Days when you feel like you're drowning. Strangely enough, it's not usually the kid that is the problem, it's the system that is supposed to be there to help him or her. (although kids too are fun some days ... Ryan took out my GPS yesterday! Poor kid! He felt awful!)

I spend hours and hours each week researching, comparing and billing for various services. Don't get me wrong ... I LOVE that Ryan gets to partake in all of his disability services that get him into the community or that make a difference in his overall quality of life. I just get tired, weary and frustrated with the paperwork and circus that can surround it all. The amount of work leaves little time for anything else.

What about you? Even answering a simple medical form for a program ends up being a novella! What has your fish line in a knot?

If you're feeling like a bobber today, I pray that you remember that God will keep you afloat. Bobbers rise up to the top of the water.

Have a great day and remember that I'm praying for you and yours,

Much love and joy,

Karen

The Benefits of Storytelling

My father has been gone now for sixteen years. It doesn't seem like it can be that long. When father's day looms I feel just a little sad. My son barely remembers him. Yesterday, however, we went fishing and all sorts of stories came to me, stories I could tell Ryan about his Boppa.

We laughed about motoring into the Mississippi River sloughs where it was common to get our lines caught in the low slung bushes when casting .... then I got my line caught in a low slung bush while casting ... and had to rip it out by yanking on the pole.

We laughed and told stories about Boppa. When we were done for the day, I told Ryan more incidents from our fishing days with his grandfather.

What's my point? Don't underestimate the power of storytelling your family history to your child with special needs, especially those stories that are about other people and the things they used to do that weren't perfect. As Robin Williams says on Good Will Hunting, "That's the good stuff."

If I gently tell about Boppa getting his line stuck in a bush and laugh warmly and affectionately, then when Ryan gets his line stuck we can laugh with him. He's like Boppa. He's connected. He's part of a larger group, his family. His inability is shared. His Boppa used to do that from time to time, his mom just did that and look ... now he did too.

Storytelling about other family members also works on more than connectedness, it works on common language and it works on memory (there is a vested interest in remembering the story). It has benefits on so many different levels.

Tell your child a story today, about your childhood, about your young adulthood. He or she can learn from your tales of joy and woe.

Until next time,

Much love and joy,

Karen

Happy Father's Day!

Happy Father's Day!

Ryan's not a father technically, but he's a godfather to the little gal you see here, Chloe. He takes his job very seriously and has given her childrens' books about prayer and various Bible stories. He prays for his little charge and thinks of her on holidays and birthdays.

I love that he is so careful about his duties of godfather. It reminds me how deep his faith is.

Have a wonderful father's day and we'll see you tomorrow.

Much love and joy,

Karen

Ryan's Fence is Done!

Ryan's privacy/safety fence is finally done. The  construction is finishing up the clean up and we'll be sitting sweet! Here's a shot of the way it flows to the corner and around. Forgive my ratty looking yard, I need to tend to that too as soon as I'm off crutches.

This is the side patio view. This is a long area but I'm taking a pic while sitting at my little table and chairs in the same area. I'll probably cute this all up by getting a bistro set when they go on sale and putting some flowers out there etc.

If you need a privacy fence I recommend Strait-Edge Construction instead of just going with a fencing company. They came in and prepped the site by removing a huge steel clothesline that had been there forever and went deep into the ground with concrete, they cut out a truck load (literally!!!) of brush on the fence line, a small tree and cleaned out debris (rotted timbers and the like) behind our shed that I would've had to move (and couldn't). They even transplanted bushes to fill in the holes the clothesline made so no one would step in them and break a leg. I was sincerely impressed.  They were on top of every step of the process.

My neighbor is a crotchety old guy and was whining constantly about the rocks that line the fence coming through to his side of the fence, even though they've been there since we bought the house ten years ago and he helped shovel them in with the previous tenants! Strait-Edge made sure to attach some wire mesh to the bottom of the fence and curl it under the rocks. They moved the rocks over it afterwards to cover any unsightly wire. Then they went onto the neighbors side to cover any mesh over there too. Not a service EVER included in straight fencing projects. In fact, when I got quotes, Hayworth Fencing was more expensive than Strait-Edge and they didn't even have the removal of existing fence in their quote! I would've had to deal with all that on my own and I'm just not able to do it physically, you know?

Here's another shot off the back patio. Notice the day lilies, daisies, Black-Eyed Susans and Tiger Lilys against the fence. They're barely disturbed! The crews were all professional and very hard working.

Ryan loves his new fence and even went out to put his little scarecrow in his horticultural beds all by himself! 

Here's a photo of  "Happy" in Ryan's gardens. (note the huge produce! That kid has a green thumb!)

Until we get locks on the gates, however, Happy comes in at night.

Oh yeah, Strait Edge constructed the stand-up horticultural beds you see to the left of the photo here as well (in a separate project). I should have taken some better shots of those. Check out my blog post on Horticultural Therapy and you'll see better pics of Ryan's gardening beds.

Here's a photo of Ryan and his pooch, Poppie. Look at how relaxed Ryan looks. He's so happy! He slept well last night too. He's always worried about people breaking into the house so closes his bedroom window even when it's nice. He did leave it open a couple of inches last night because his room window is inside the fence. HUGE stuff for us.

The IRIS program is helping Ryan pay for the fence in case you have IRIS for your young person with disabilities. Strait-Edge Construction does a ton of government work and will deal directly with IRIS or your agency if you want him to. Less stress for us in our already stressed out worlds! He's done some hospital work and also has a consultant who works for a government housing and weatherization project who knows the ADA compliance issues.

 They do all sorts of construction so they're not limited to fencing. Check with the owner, Kris, on bathroom remodels for accessibility and other projects. He has a heart for people with disabilities and it shows!

Well, I want to get busy. It was sunny when I got up at 7:00 (Ryan slept in! Maybe that fresh air in the window he let be open!) Now I see it's overcast an hour later. Pffft!

Happy Saturday! We'll see you tomorrow!

Much love and joy,

Karen

My Life is a Circus

My Life is a Circus, seriously. I'd like to say I'm the ringmaster of this show but sometimes I feel more like the woman on the tightrope, balancing precariously and trying to get to the other side safely.

I get tired of trying to figure out the right questions, having rules change mid program or mid project. The secrecy of some people in the helping profession as though parents are out to take advantage of them. Let's face it, some will, but I believe that proportion is fairly small.

Even parents who have become employed by agencies get paranoid. I knew one gal who worked in a helping position and ran a parent group on the side. She was so flippin' paranoid that she wouldn't allow anyone to really get involved. She said she wanted help, but she really didn't and chased away the most energetic and dedicated individuals so she could be ringmaster of her the group. It was sad.

It's been my experience that qualified people typically surround themselves with other qualified people. They are secure in their abilities and talents. People who are not really very good at what they do are paranoid that someone is going to be more qualified and bump them out of position. It must be stressful and lonely to operate that way, don't you think? Kind of the Peter Principle with Paranoia.

Hope your weekend is delightful. We're finishing up some clean up on the new privacy fence today and take some pics to post tomorrow. Then we hope to do some fun stuff this weekend. I'd like to hit the farmer's market and see what's out there, as well as Just Local foods. We bought strawberries yesterday from McIllquam's and they are absolutely delicious! I'm thinking of going back for more and making some jam this weekend, I have an easy recipe I love.

Also thinking maybe a baseball game or some kind of festival. There are tons around each weekend. I'm still using one crutch but moving around pretty well. My ankles and feet swell a little in the heat since the surgery. That's drag because on the hottest days my sandals don't fit. Pffft!

We'll see you soon. Take care and give your special person an extra hug from me today. I'm praying for you and yours.

Much love and joy,

Karen

Fun and Work

Ryan and his grandma went to the Shrine circus yesterday.  It was the first decent day we've had in a while. It's been so cool and rainy every day. While that's better than steamy it didn't feel much like summer.

They had a great time and Ryan came home with programs (two different ones) a light saber and many pictures of him with various clowns. He enjoyed himself and ate junk like popcorn and cotton candy.

Getting Organized - I've been working steadily on getting organized and wanted to show you this amazing labeler. $28 at WalMart. I'd been using computer labels. I was making a list of labels I needed, then when I had a full list of thirty I'd print the labels. It was time consuming and annoying. I thought about getting a labeler that you use with the computer and didn't really want the expense. Then I saw the LetroTag.

(Picture angels singing here!) It's amazing! I took a pic and included the cartridge in the photo. I've been labeling things like a mad woman. Nothing is safe. My folders, my stamp sets, various storage boxes ... you name it, I'm gonna slap a label on it.

If you're an organization junkie like I am you'll love this little toy. And no, WalMart isn't paying me to say it! Keep in mind that Office Max was $2 higher on a single cartridge OUCH, so shop around for those. They come in white, clear and various colors like red, green and blue.

Talk to you tomorrow,

Much love and joy,

Karen

The Nature of Lakes

A couple of summers ago southern Wisconsin had copious amounts of rain and Lake Delton, a man made lake, overflowed into the river and "left" the area ... at least the water did. This is a photo of Ryan standing on the bottom of the lake. The bumps you see in the background are actually tree stumps from when they cleared the land to make the lake.

Ryan, in his typical fashion, looked puzzled. "You can't control a lake," he said. "Only God can do that. Lakes will do what they want to do." I loved that. Lakes will do what they want to do. It reminds me of an old American Indian saying, "You can't step on the same piece of water twice." That's why it was so hard for the Indians to understand the white man's ownership of water, and for that matter, land. Everything is living, shifting, moving and changing. Our lives are like that. We can't really control them either, only God can do that. We will do what we want to do, but ultimately, we can't control a lot of what happens in our lives because everything is changing as rapidly as water.

The next time you feel your life spin out of control, remember that you are along for the ride. Maybe the river, your life, is heading in another direction. Hang on tight and see where you end up.

Much love and joy,

Karen

Man's Best Friend

This is our pooch, Poppie Yo Yo Neck Rumpelstiltskin Mudge Pluto Goofy Olson. No, she's not a purebred, she's a mutt and Ryan named her. She's half Golden Retriever and half Springer/Cocker mix. We got her from the pound when she was a pup. She's just the sweetest thing! It wasn't always that way though!

When she was a puppy she was a handful, as most puppies are. She was adorable but tried our patience no end. She wanted to mouth everything, mainly us, in her soft retriever mouth. She had so much energy I could walk her for two miles and she was just warming up to play ball. She ate my houseplants, dragged pillows over to and slept on couches, watched TV upside down hanging off the couch and in general was all over the place. You couldn't hold her, she wouldn't stay still long enough. There were times when I just sat and cried. Other times I laughed so hard I nearly peed myself.

She's 11 now and some calmer, I don't think she was civil until she was seven! She has been an amazing friend to Ryan and a great source of entertainment for both of us. Make no mistake about it, however, dogs are work and they need their "pack" at home.

A friend of mine watched Ryan with his dog and decided to get her child with special needs a dog. She went out and purchased an expensive pure breed. Shocked at how much work and attention a dog needed she ended up taking him to the pound. A sad story, I think.

Make sure you know dogs before you get one. Dog sit for a while for someone. Investigate breeds that fit your family, not just those that "look cool" or "tough". A Chow is a cool looking dog but is also known as a "One-man" dog who is possessive and jealous. Not one you'd want around kids. Think hard. Are you home enough to train the dog, keep it company and pay attention to it? You need to be.

Poppie has been amazing for Ryan, mutts are usually pretty sweet tempered. I wrote an article on Pet Therapy once and believe me, the health benefits are there! Just make sure you get your pooch from the pound, there are so many that need homes!

See you tomorrow,

Much love and joy,

Karen

Summer Daze and Getaways - An Alphabet of Saturdays

Summer Daze and Getaways - An Alphabet of Saturdays

Summer is almost here…finally, and most of us will have children home. I gave a little thought to a number of things that we can do to get away on a Saturday either as a couple or as a family, including the child or adult with special needs. Have a great summer!






A - Automobile – jump in the car and turn onto every street with a name that begins with a the first letter of your last name. For children who do not know the alphabet you can turn at a particular type of landmark. Pack a picnic lunch and plan to be away the entire day.

B - Bicycle Trail – with a snack of bread, cheese, fruit and sparkling water pedal to a shady outdoor scenic area to have lunch.

C - Café it – find an outdoor café and order a latte and biscotti, enjoy one another’s company alfresco and people watch.

D -  Deck chairs – enjoy a day at the beach. Bring an umbrella, sunscreen and spend the day walking on the beach, building sand castles and swimming

E - Elope! – get someone to take the children overnight and the two of you head for a bed and breakfast in a neighboring town.

F - Fishing – go fishing for an afternoon. Practice the technique of catch and release. Measure each fish before you throw it back. The one who catches the largest fish gets to pick the restaurant for an early supper.

G - Games – go to a summer afternoon or evening baseball game. Sit in the bleachers and bring your glove. Wear a baseball cap, jersey and jeans. Loosen up and have fun!

H - Hike – hike a trail together. If you can bring backpacks and set up camp for the night so much the better…don’t forget bug dope and make sure to check the fire risk before you go.

I - Ice Cream – go to an ice cream shop and order flavors that you have never tried before. Then set them in the middle of the table and taste them together, rank them on a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being your favorite.

J - Jazz it up! – head for an establishment that has jazz musicians and spend the evening as a couple.

K - Kickball – get friends and their children together for an afternoon of kickball. Make it the best two out of three. Losers take winners out for pizza.

L - Laugh!! – make arrangements with friends to go to a Comedy Club together. Tip the waitress extravagantly; sit toward the front where the comedian can tease you.

M - Music – in the park! Head to a park with a band shell in the early evening. Bring a stadium blanket to sit on and listen to the music.

N - Night Run! – Just before bedtime yell “Jammie Run” and everyone pile into the car. Go through a drive through window at a restaurant and order everyone a cookie for a bedtime snack in your PJs.

O - Outdoor theater – yes, there are still a few around. Find one and go. Get popcorn and bring the mosquito coil. Park in the rows that still have the old fashioned speakers that hook on your window…if its been a while since you attended…don’t forget to put the speaker back before you drive off, remember high school?

P - Plays – get tickets for a local production and attend, if you know some of the actors so much the better. Go for a walk afterwards.

Q - Quidditch – Read the Harry Potter books as a family. Take turns reading them aloud to each other on a rainy Saturday.

R - Ride Horses – learn to ride horses together at a neighboring stable. If you already know how to ride, reintroduce yourself to the freedom of it.

S - Sketch – even if you are not an artist, sketch your children, your husband or wife, the dog, a pot of flowers, a tomato plant, whatever strikes your eye. Concentrate on lines and form, not perfection.

T - Tennis – bring a couple of rackets and head to the nearest tennis court.

U - Umbrella – grab an umbrella and boots and walk in the gentle summer rain on a warm afternoon. Don’t miss any puddles! (Do make sure that there is not lightening before you set out.)

V - Video Night – Rent movies and pretend that the couch is a boat. Bring all items needed for an uninterrupted movie. The only reason to get up is to go to the bathroom.

W - Wax on, wax off – wash and wax the car together. Wear old clothes and be playful.

X - xxxxxxxxxxx lots of kisses for your family. Kiss your mate while waiting in line for theater tickets, in the grocery store, or some other place where you don’t usually think of it. Kiss the kids when they least expect it. Make it a contest. Whoever gives the most kisses, wins.

Y - Yahtzee! Have a game night. Invite friends over. Tell them dress is casual (shorts or sweats) and to bring a board game and appetizer. Women, hair requirements are ponytails and headbands, Men wear caps and tennis shoes or sandals. Snack on appetizers and play games all evening. Cap off the night with a toast at midnight and souvenir dice or cards for each couple attending as a memento. Things like silly decks of cards and fuzzy dice for car rear view mirrors go over well. The children can have their game night too with older children or caregivers running the show in another room.

Z - Zoo – spend the day taking pictures of each other acting like the animals in front of their respective cages. Pick your favorite animal of the day and buy a stuffed version of it at the gift store. Hang a tag on it with the date and each write a message on it. Bring it out the next time you go to the zoo and take more pictures of the family with its newest member!

Enjoy your alphabet of Saturdays!

Much love and Joy!
Karen

The New Bathroom

I loved this bathroom! It was so cozy and unique. But, it didn't meet Ryan's needs and a total remodel was needed to do that! So last summer we sucked it up and did it. Ryan's adult services helped and the chaos began!

 We discovered holes in the wall when we took down the medicine cabinets! The cabinet on the right literally had a slice in the back for plumbing pipes. That meant that dust in the walls etc. had access to our toothbrushes and the like. Ryan is allergic to house dust among other things so this wasn't a good option! We had to drywall patch.

 We need to move a wing wall to accommodate the therapy tub Ryan needed. Unfortunately, this meant I had to say good-bye to my stackable washer and dryer on the first floor! I'm doing laundry in the basement, which is okay, it's just not the first floor, you know?

The toilet was too low and didn't have grab bars so we installed a comfort rise toilet with a non-peened grab bar to increase independence and safety. We put 18 inch peened vertical grab bars on both sides of the new tub and a 36 " diagonal peened on the back wall. (Peened just means textured, so you don't slip).

We priced a tub/shower surround but because of the size of the tub it would have to be custom made. The price was outrageous. We priced putting up tile instead and it was about the same money. To decrease the "institutionalized" look we went with tile.

The tub itself has two grab bars so we had, count 'em, FIVE grab bars in the tub area. We didn't put a deck on the tub because it wouldn't been too hard for Ryan to get in and out, plus there was somewhat of a space limit.

We replaced the medicine cabinet with one that was enclosed and that Ryan could open more easily. When it was all said and done we had a bathroom that fit Ryan's needs perfectly. While I missed my sweet amethyst colored bath, I'm learning to like this one. It's such a joy to see Ryan in his whirlpool! He got out one night and said, "Mom, I feel great!" The quality of his sleep has improved with regular whirlpools to say nothing of the sitz bath effect. All in all, worth the four months of hassle!

Here's the finished project:

You can see the tub surround in the mirror. Ryan chose the color Baja Breeze for his bathroom. Everything else is neutral.

Oh yeah, one more WONDERFUL feature of the tub is chromotherapy. Ryan is profoundly hard of hearing, ergo he is highly visual. We put in a chromotherapy light and now he can choose a color each bath (out of about six) for his water. A light shines on the water and gives health benefits.

There's a booklet that comes with the tub that gives "recipes" for various ailments for lack of a better word. For example, relaxation requires only the small therapy bubbles, the lavender light and medium intensity of bubbles. Joint or muscle pain (Ryan has Cerebral Palsy) is counteracted by the Orange light and large, slow massage bubbles.

This is a picture from the booklet showing the blue chromotherapy light. Our bath doesn't have the great artwork or lovely candles!

The tub also had the option of aromatherapy but Ryan has so many allergies we decided that it could be more trouble than it was worth.

At any rate, the bath is done and meets his needs beautifully. I LOVE the new toilet with grab bar and Ryan is fond of sharing that information! At any rate, thanks to Ryan's adult funding he is toileting more independently, getting numerous massages from his tub, able to use the medicine cabinet safely and sleeping better! So very many benefits with such a simple answer!

Take care and see you tomorrow,

Much love and joy,

Karen

Weight Management

Ryan is a part of the Best Buddy program at UWEC. This is his buddy, Sam. They won first place this year in the golf outing. I can't even imagine what wildness ensues there. I've talked about Best Buddies before but wanted to upload this photo. Ryan has lost almost 10 pounds since it was taken in May. He's working so hard at taking off some weight.

I'm trying along side him. It's hard when you're genetically prone to a larger size. I've always had to do TONS of exercise if I want to even maintain my weight at a decent level, to say nothing of lose weight. He's somewhat the same but he's also twenty years old and a guy. We all know how much easier it is to lose! For his sake, I hope the pounds just slide off.

We're using the Richard Simmons program. It comes with the little plastic book like think where you slide windows over pictures of food exchanges.

Adding calories involved math skills and was out of the question. We also purchased the Richard Simmons exercise DVDs. One is a Sweatin' with the Oldies type workout, the other is a work out you can do SITTING DOWN. Huge for people who use wheelchairs, in fact he has a number of people with disabilities in the video. I highly recommend the program so far. He also sends Richard Grams in the email, has an online support group etc. I read the emails to Ryan. We haven't been on the on line group for him yet but we entered his weight in a weight tracker which should be affirming and positive. Speaking of affirming and positive, I like the way Richard includes that on his tracker as well:

The above photo give a sample of what's on there for affirmations. Great, huh?  At any rate, a nod to Richard for making an eating plan that someone with disabilities can be included in. You can get all of this on line at his site.

How do you work with your child's weight issues if they have them?

Talk to you soon,

Much love and joy,

Karen

Blogger weirdness

I decided to try a new template that blogger made available today ... yikes! I think I jumped the gun! I've got fields overlaying fields and a real mess on my hands. It looks fine in my edit screen but not on the view screen. Can't get through to Blogger so .... I'm stuck with this mess until I can. So sorry!

I'll enter something decent when I can,
God bless,

Karen

I worry about Ryan and high blood pressure. We take it and its fine but sometimes he looks a little bloated. I've had his thyroid checked (I'm hypothyroid and on meds) but it comes out normal. I used to bloat too before I was on meds. However, I went into the lab many many times and had normal readings until I finally said, "Let me have carte blanche, I'll come in whenever I feel the worst" and my numbers were off the charts.

I was about his age too. Anyone else dealing with either thyroid, bloating or blood pressure issues? It's so frustrating, you know?

I'm on the fly today so will check in tomorrow. Take care of you. Prayers for a wonderful, peaceful day.

Much love and joy,

Karen

Head to the Park!

Ryan loves parks. I've seen more County and State parks with him than I have at any other time in my life, including the Girl Scout years. This is Coon Forks accessible fishing dock. It's amazing. Many trails are paved so are wheelchair accessible. The camping is supposed to be as well but we didn't head over there. I'm a hotel girl, past the age of laying on the ground all night.

If you haven't explored some of the parks you really need to. There's a lot out there for people with disabilities. Fishing licenses are discounted in our state. It's not really about catching fish as much as enjoying a day out. Yeah, we want to catch fish, but we catch and release so it's not a huge deal for us.

Have a wonderful summer day! Wondering what to do? Head for a park!

Much love and joy,

Karen

Rainy Cocoon Day

Ryan and I both have vicious colds today. We slept until 9:00 which is unheard of for either of us. Although, in our defense, it is raining and twilit out there. The windows are open a crack so you hear the rain and feel the cool moist breeze. To snuggle under the blanket and breathe all that wonderfully humidified air felt awesome!

My mother will sometimes do respite for me when I'm sick and Ryan's not, but she has this crud too. Ryan was sick with it last week and we both must have caught it from him. He was over it by the weekend except for the residual crud so he's just got the tail end of the cough now. I have to watch that too so it doesn't escalate suddenly.

However, no rest for the weary today. It's OK. It's a good day to cocoon what with the rain and all. Yesterday was GORGEOUS and I plowed through, grilling and making dinner which is saying something when you don't feel like eating. And I ALWAYS feel like eating, ya know??

I'm Ryan's PCW so there's no taking the day off. I provide those cares no matter how sick I am. I wouldn't have it any other way. Well ... it'd be nice if someone would cook though. I hate cooking when I'm sick. I'd just as soon make canned chicken soup and be done with it.

Hope your day is a good one, healthy and happy.

See you tomorrow,
Much love and joy to you and yours,
Karen

My Knight in Shining Armor

Sometimes Ryan is my knight in shining armor. He fights battles I will never know. He faces enemies of his attention, time and body that I will never experience. And through it all he is chivalrous, maintains grace and is stronger than I'll ever be. He has grown into a young man that I'm proud of. He gives everything one hundred percent.

I wish I could take all the "disability crud" away. The picture above with Ryan in the beaver suit is a glimpse of the person behind all the disability. The person that might have been. I LOVE the person that IS and wouldn't trade him for all the world, but I'd like to make life easier for him. A LOT easier.

Take care and we'll see you tomorrow.

God bless,

Karen