Despicable Me

Doesn't she look sad? She wasn't but I thought her little face had a downcast look to it. Poor baby! (Poor spoiled baby is more like it.)

Ryan's IRIS consultant is visiting today so we're up earlier than normal. Saturdays are usually a day to sleep in. Lately anyway. I want to sleep more and more as autumn approaches. Come on Vit D!

Ryan and I saw "Despicable Me" at the Drive In movie theater and I highly recommend it. I was so cute. Steve Carrell is, of course, delightful. The villian, Vector, was loosely based on Phil Spector so there was some tongue in cheek humor there. All in all worth our $8 each. Two thumbs up!

We're picking cukes in Ryan's garden. He's having sensory issues with the flurry, picky cuke plant leaves but then, who doesn't? He's braving it though!

Today's post is pointless and short. I'm tired and I have a ton to do so will let you get started on your day too! God bless you and your family. May he inspire you as you care for your special someone.
Much love and joy,

Karen

I'm a Bad Mother

I lost my temper last night and yelled at Ryan. I feel like the most horrible mom on earth. He didn't deserve it. I was overtired (we'd gone to the drive-in theater) overwhelmed (I had 15 million things in my one hand while the other struggled with the crutch) and he was so unconscious of helping me. I had no right to snap at him like I did and even though I apologized profusely and he forgave me I'm still so angry with myself. Bad mother, bad mother, BAD mother!

We all know that kids can take us to places that we didn't even know existed but usually counting to ten, walking away or other coping mechanisms take over. Our good sense wins out. Once in a while we find ourselves reacting at a gut level and barking at them in a way we wouldn't talk to the dog. The self recrimination and condemnation is hard to deal with afterwards. It makes me wonder about abusive parents. Are they so much MORE overwhelmed than the rest of us? Do they have less coping, less modeling of good behavior, less patience, less ... what?

We don't snap at our kids when we're feeling good, do we? We yell when we've reached a breaking point. So, in abusive families, where is that breaking point? It can't be income. Abuse cuts across all socioeconomic classes. I know sometimes alcohol is involved. That makes sense if we're talking about breaking points. A person who is drinking will have less tolerance simply because all his or her inhibiting skills have gone to zero.

At any rate, back to my scenario. There is no way I can take back the words I spoke (snarled actually ... shut up! Shut up! Shut up!) is what I said. I can't fix this. I apologized, he forgave me ... now the hard part. I need to forgive myself. Why is that always the hardest part?

Have a good day today and give your person with special needs an extra hug. They put up with a lot from us.
Much love and joy,
Karen

Don't forget August!

I can't believe it's almost August. I love autumn. It's one of my favorite four seasons . I've told you all my three month rule right? June, July and August are summer; September, October and November are fall; December, January and February are winter; and March, April, and May are spring. That's usually where people get messed up. They think of winter as November through April. No, no, no.

Yes, it snows in November, but mainly it's a windy month of wood smoke, bare trees and early evening cozy at home. December is winter. But, we're getting ahead of ourselves. The point I'm trying to make is that often times we "wish away" August by thinking of back to school, autumn and scarecrows. STOP! August is still an awesome month of summer! The entire last THIRD of summer! Keep cooking out, taking road trips and having fun!

I have to admit that August is sometimes a month of Home. Don't you agree? We've taken vacation, we done all the summer activities. August is laying in a hammock, reading. August is watching a late movie and eating ice cream. August is opting for visiting family instead of wild vacations. August is almost a re-centering of our lives to get ready for the busyness of fall and the inward turn of winter.

 I love listening to cicadas, locusts, crickets and birds. Even the birds seem less frenetic in August. Have an amazing rest of the summer.

Much love and joy,

Karen

Meaningful Work

Ryan spent time at his game reserve cleaning snake tanks yesterday. He even watched the snakes eat. He's fascinated by varieties, venom, uses for venom and every little snake fact. He's had the passion for this creature since he was tiny. He visited the reserve and held his first snake when he was three years old!

Interestingly, his hobby has developed into meaningful work. He loves his snake buddies and they seem to like him. Who can tell with snakes thought, right? He's started eyeing the turtle tanks too.

The neat thing is that it all provides context for conversation and shared interests. His grandfather, a biologist and geneticist, would have loved sharing this with him. The woman who oversees him is such an accepting and warm person. She gives Ryan respect and that's saying something. She doesn't hover. I, on the other hand, hovered a lot at the beginning. Now I bring my laptop and work.

Pursue your child's passions. You never know what will turn into a job/career when s/he is older.

God bless,

Much love and joy,

Karen

Life is Good

Life is good. It is, you know. No matter how much the little things get you down I believe that counting our blessings and realizing what is important is crucial to our happiness. 

• I have a roof over my head
• I have AC in the summer and heat in the winter
• I have food on the table
• I have family
• I have friends
• I have a job and hobbies that I love
• I have my health
• I have my faith.

What more do I need? Count your blessings today. Life is good.

Much love and joy,

Karen

Summer Salad Recipe

Good morning everyone!

I'm posting a little late this morning because I had a Summer Salad to make and I wasn't about to forget it since it's the only other thing we're having tonight other than grilled steak. Just an economical trick on steak ... choose your steak and have them cut it for you again lengthwise. The steaks are the same size but half the thickness. They cook faster and it's plenty of meat!

Today I'm just going to put down the recipe for that Summer Salad ... Here you go...

Summer Salad

1 box (7 ox) ring macaroni

Bring to a boil with  1 tsp salt and cook according to package directions. Rinse and cool.

Add:

1 med onion, chopped fine

2 cups fresh cucumbers (I use little pickling cukes that are so abundant right now), chopped

1 cup celery, chopped

2 cups grated carrots

1/2 tsp pepper

Dressing:

1 1/2 cup mayo

1/2 cup apple cider vinegar

1 1/2 cup sugar

1/2 tsp salt

Mix dressing with the rest and chill. I make the dressing a little scant because it seems to make a little much I thought. Kids LOVE this salad. Gets all those carrots, celery and cukes down them too.

Have a wonderful day and we'll see you tomorrow.

Much love and joy,

Karen

Visual Learners

Good Morning!

Don't you love this old fashioned carriage? Doing research for a book I'm writing and had to see one up close and personal. I wanted to feel the wheels so to speak.

Ryan and I love museums. He's so visual. He gets ten times more out of seeing something than reading about it. His senses start working overtime and he's got it.

We try to make his life environment and sensory rich. Bath time is filled with colored light and air jets. Time in the back yard is filled with gardening, playing with the dog and grilling. Day-long road trips are filled with stops to view sites, visit museums and eat different foods. Even though Ryan likes his routine he has an adventuresome side that, when saturated with new sites, will embrace new sights, sounds, smells and sensations.

Lately every time we get a nice day we run. The dog is starting to resent sunny days I think. Poor little thing. We've figured out the area museums and will fit those in on rainy days, unless they're outside museums.

All that to say ... museums are a staple with our children. So many of them learn by seeing.

Have a fun Sunday,

Much love and joy,

Karen

Ryan's First Tomatoes!

Good morning!

E-mailed my Family Times column to my editor for my column, Life on the Exceptional Side. The column is called Ten Tips for Back to School and discusses some helpful information for approaching the new school year with a child who has special needs. Make sure to pick up a copy. It'll be out around the first weekend in August.

Ryan picked his first tomatoes yesterday. We've been picking about a pound of string beans every day and he's been eating them! Awesome, right? Now he's popping cherry tomatoes in his mouth and we picked our first big ones.

He looks so proud, doesn't he? The item in his right hand is a very small carrot. Since we need to thin those he's been pulling one every now and then. He can't wait until they're big enough to eat.

I can't tell you how these waist high adaptable beds have made a difference in our lives along with the privacy fence. Who knew two such simple things could change things so much for Ryan? But they did.

Here's a shot of the haul. The beans are slowing down so we've not had to worry much about them the last few days but the cucumbers are going absolutely crazy! They're among his favorites to eat so he's thrilled. He was shocked to find out how prickly/fuzzy the leaves were. His sensory issues kicked into play but he had such a mad desire to see the little cukes that he pushed at the leaves, shuddered and peeked under them. Needless to say he didn't hang on long, but he TRIED it! I was very proud of him.

He's so relaxed when we come in. All that weeding, picking and fussing around relaxes him so much! The fresh air and sunshine is so good for him. Ryan has a tan this year for the very first time.

Check out the sandal marks on those tan feet!! He tried scrubbing them until I clued him in on what was going on!

We'll heading out to the grocery store today I hope. I need to figure out what we're eating this week. We've been horrible about eating out. It's so much fun to meet with family and friends for a meal. We've been going out a little too much.

Well, that's it for me. See you tomorrow. Take care!

Much love and joy,

Karen

Rain Rain Go Away

Rain, rain, go away

Come again some other day

Little Karen wants to play

Rain, rain go away

OR

It's raining, it's pouring

The old man is snoring

Wake him up and put him in bed

Can't get up in the morning

Yep, it's been raining so much I'm weary of it. I want sunshine. Speaking as someone low on vitamin D ... it's kind of essential for me! The odd thing is, when it's sunny I'm almost manic, trying to get as much living as I can in out in the sun! Who knew my body actually craved it?

I have errands on the agenda today. If you have a young person with disabilities you know that this can be an all day job for errands that would normally take only a couple of hours. It's just the way it is. The problem today is that I have some weird intestinal crud going on that prevents me from straying too far from the house. Nuts. It's almost 10 a.m. and I'm still sitting here! I can't figure out if it's something I ate or I'm fighting off the flu. I'm tired, achey and nauseous. I hate being sick. I don't have time for it, you know? Its just so ... inconvenient. So much for most of my errands, right? This is when being a single parent blows. No one to pick up milk and bread. No nap for me.

What do you do when you're sick and alone with your person who has special needs? Do you have someone you can call? Someone who can run out and get groceries or medication for you? It's not as easy calling family and friends as it is to have a mate in the home. That's all there is to it. I'm not feeling sorry for myself, just stating a fact. It is what it is.

Yesterday was a lovely cocooning day. But, I want out now. Hopefully this is something that will pass in the next few hours and I can get out there and get something done.

Gotta scram.

Much love and joy,

Karen

Movie Critique - The Sorcerers Apprentice

Good morning!

It's a rainy day here and I'm trying to decide what I should do with Ryan. I'm thinking art and therapeutic scrapbooking. We did a lot of horticultural therapy and occupational therapy yesterday. I'm ready for something less active. I think we might bake too. That's a mom thing, you know? Ryan has been baking since he was tiny with his G'ma but he and I typically do other things. We'll see how ambitious I am. We went to the Drive In theater last night and that's a late night for me.

We saw The Sorcerer's Apprentice with Nicholas Cage. Loved Cage, jury is still out on the movie. I liked the beginning but it was pretty dark at the end for Disney. Got into pentagrams and weird crap like that. I would not recommend for children at all. Ryan and I talked about it afterwards and he felt the same way, just a little too dark. We're looking forward to Despicable Me starting next week, though. That looks cute.

One of the reasons Ryan and I wait to buy on DVD and don't go to a lot of movies is that dark factor. PG-13 is not necessarily a good rating for us. We've gone to R movies that have been less icky than some PGs. (Icky is a movie critic term you know!) Typically, I screen movies and have all of Ryan's life but now I try to figure it out and we just go.

You can't trust Disney anymore either which is sad. Who's running the store down there, fellas? Get it together and hang out with some kids. Why did Hannah Montana do so well? Or Clarissa Explains it All? Because they were cute. The world is scary enough for these kids, they want fun shows they can escape into, like we did with Bewitched or The Brady Bunch. Carry that over into movies. Try new techniques like the Pixar movies. We all loved that, didn't we?

Also, stop with the strobe-like action. You're going to cause brain damage, or at minimum raging headaches. Choppy, fast movie sequences do not create suspense, they create choppy, hard to follow movie scenes. Get a grip. Tell a good story! Kids are so smart and saavy these days. You don't have to shock and titillate ... just tell a good story! \

At any rate, I give the movie 2 out of 5 stars, stars  are awarded to Nicholas Cage, the kids in it (the kid who played the apprentice, his girlfriend and the kid arch enemy with blonde spiky hair) and the start of the movie which had a good plot. Cinematography gets a thumbs down from us as does the entire end of the script.

Have a great day and we'll see you tomorrow.
Much love and joy,

Karen

Ryan is OUT of the building!

Good morning everyone!

It's a beautiful day and we have a lot to do. Summer is always like that, isn't it?

Ryan started UCP Teen Group yesterday and had a great time. They made art projects. He came home with a cool little tic tac toe game he made and a book necklace thing. This year they've planned outings to Paul Bunyan museum, fishing, bowling and a picnic/horse event at Legacy Farms. Ryan dearly loves the group but misses pottery they used to do. Guess I'll have to enroll us in pottery class this winter, huh?

We are furiously picking Ryan's green beans. He's never eaten so many green beans in his life! I LOVE LOVE LOVE that he's getting fresh organic vegetables. His tomatoes and cucumbers are blooming and growing like crazy so I expect we'll be eating those soon. Ryan actually has a little bit of a tan this year! I'm NOT kidding!!!!! It's slight but it's the first time that's ever happened because until we had the horticultural beds and the privacy fence he just didn't want to spend time outside in our yard.

Last night we grilled out and I made S'mores after dinner. We sat on the patio while we ate the messy things. I went into the house to finish dishes and wash those sticky marshmallow forks and ... wait for it ... Ryan stayed outside with the dog BY HIMSELF! I pushed it a little and took out garbage and went to the bathroom. I was inside a good ten to fifteen minutes. I got ready to go out and he was coming in. HUGE for us.

Today we're headed to the greenhouse for more horticultural therapy. I also want to give him a chance to socialize and talk about his garden with employees and other customers.  I'm blown away by how much it helps him. At any rate, I'll see you tomorrow. God bless and make sure to get outside today.

Much love and joy,

Karen

My New Pantry

Hi there,

I've told you before that I'm an organization junkie and this pantry is no different. I have very deep shelves and things get lost so easily. I was re-buying items I already had and not buying others, simply because I couldn't find them or thought I had them. Enough! I decided to spend the money on organizing and figure I'll have it in a year.

Isn't it awesome???? I arranged things atypically. One storage area is spaghetti, another chili and a third strogonoff. That  way I know if I have the ingredients for a particular meal. The gal at the store asked what I was doing with all the containers. When I told her she said, "But then you only have that many meals to choose from." Not really. This are the meals I cook over and over. These are the items in the pantry for the good old standbys.

Let's say we're going to grill. That involves meat, vegetables and some sort of salad. That's not going to be in the pantry anyway. What about chicken and stove top stuffing with potatoes (a winter meal). I have one container labeled beef and two labeled chicken. They hold broth, gravy, Shake n Bake, Cornflake crumbs, chicken soup, and various related items. A container labeled 'sides'  will have the stuffing. I keep the potatoes in the frig. It works, trust me.

I used my Sissix Big Shot to create labels for the various baskets.

Aren't they darling? I cut out a circle with a Clear Die Cut in a chocolate color. Then I ran it through in an embossing folder to give it texture. The petal portion is a daffodil color and cut with a scallop die. I used mini glue dots to fix them together and my wonderful Dymo labeler (see a previous post) to tag the baskets.

This is the contact paper that I'll put under the baskets as soon as I get a chance. With all the basket work and cleaning I didn't get to the contact paper ... but I will!!

I even have a basket labeled snacks. I have Snackwell cookies, mini boxes of raisins and various other items in there. A serendipitous effect was that I could see how many healthy snacks I had versus the unhealthy junk food ones. Now I can put more healthy ones in there!

I have a couple of large baskets on the top shelf because I have more room and also I needed a place for crackers and chips. Otherwise the bags are everywhere.

Bottom line, you have to give up half a day to get this done, more if you don't have the containers. Expect to spend $100 to $150 organizing but if I don't keep re-buying or letting food expire I should make that up in a year.

Have a great day and we'll see you tomorrow!

Much love and joy,

Karen

Social Opportunities for People with Disabilities

I can't believe we're half way through summer, can you? The locusts are setting off mid-summer sirens, the cicadas are nyang-nyang-nyanging and the crickets are chirping. The wealth of sounds during the summer blows my mind just like the silence of winter can do the same.

I have purple finches in my hop hornbeam tree out front. They arrive in May, build a nest in my taller cedar bush and have babies. They are adorable and sing sweetly. Then in late June or early July, they move on. We have a cardinal pair and of course robins.

Until a few years ago Ryan couldn't hear birds. Then a man recorded a CD with bird calls. Because Ryan could turn up the volume on his CD player, he heard birds for the first time. Since then we've purchased CDs with frogs and various other wildlife that he couldn't previously hear (crickets still escape him) but he has heard birds and that's huge!

He fell in love birds and now is part of a banded bird project. He has adopted two birds so far, an indigo bunting and a gold finch. We haven't received a call that they've migrated back to the area yet. If they do come back, Ryan will get a call so he can see his adoptees and get a photo taken with them. What an amazing hobby.

He's also fascinated by eagles and hawks. We've visited the Eagle Center in Wabasha and he couldn't miss their cry from a few feet away. (He also has a passion for the American flag and there was a flag expert there one day ... God is so good!)

We all search for ways to foster friendships for our children with special needs. The only way I've found is to foster interests first. Get them involved in a variety of projects. Figure out what they enjoy or are passionate about. Dialog comes when people have things in common. Ryan's language skills have improved as he discusses birds, gardening, scrapbooking and all the other things he's involved in.

The bottom line ... stop worrying about "social opportunities." Get your special someone out and about. Develop hobbies he or she can do on their own or with your help then join groups of that nature. Social opportunities will abound. It'll never be what it would for you or me, but people, for the most part, are polite, considerate and try to answer questions and talk to our special loved ones.

God bless you today and fill you with joy at the idea of adopting a new hobby!

Much love and joy,

Karen

Schedules and Sleep

Good Morning!

It's a lazy day for us. Ryan was exhausted and I learned from experience that if he wants to sleep, he needs it. Badly.

I told my son's doctor once that Ryan was up in the night and he suggested a sleep clinic. It's like ... boy, you don't spend much time around the disabled do you? I explained that some people with cognitive issues can get their days and nights mixed up, just like babies do. For that reason I've always stuck to a rigid schedule for Ryan's bedtime.

Honestly, I believe most children do better with schedules period. It helps them feel safe. They know the boundaries of the day. I think that's particularly true of people with disabilities that mess with their understanding of time.

Now that Ryan's twenty years old he still keeps to his schedule but he can be flexible. The bedtime is later but he still goes to bed around ten o'clock. That way if he gets up in the night and can't settle back down he can have a snack and go back to bed, there's plenty of night left.

It's hard for people to understand why people with disabilities get their times all mixed up. I think its the nature of the beast. Ryan's schedule worked amazingly well for him all through childhood. If your child isn't going down at night maybe he or she is taking two naps during the day and only needs one. Or maybe, like  Ryan who outgrew naps altogether by age two, he's better off with a longer night and no naps.

Ryan's Circadian Rhythm is strong. That means that when it's dark he wants to sleep, when it's light his little body wants to be up. I'm the same way so it didn't surprise me that he and I were the same. I outgrew naps ... well, let's just say my mother told said, "You never slept. You didn't need it. You were always up and busy." So if he inherited that, combined with the weirdness that is disability it all figures.

At any rate, I've rambled enough. All that to say, don't over-react if your child is not sleeping typically. A schedule and some tweaking on your part may be all that's necessary. Sometimes diet is a factor ... but that's a topic for another blog post.

Take care and sleep sweet!

Much love and joy,

Karen

I'm fed up with the Weather Channel...

Okay, as a fan of all sorts of weather I'm going on a rant here, so stand back, you might get dirty.

I just got done watching the weather channel where the announcer, a young woman with a high pitched voice ACTUALLY jumped up and down while she described possible tornadoes in the upper Midwest today. Apparently this idiot has never seen what a tornado can do PERSONALLY. Yes, they are wild, untamed, even magnificent storms but .... there are deadly consequences and she just "ain't gettin' it."

I don't think she understands the sick feeling people get when the sky turns green or how they feel when running to a basement or bathroom and hoping that loved ones are safe. Tornadoes and storms are spectacular enough without being sensationalized by them. I plan on writing to ask what their function is. The last umpteen times we've had weather issues and needed radar and warning information they forecast it in a tiny box at the bottom of their screen while playing Storm Stories or some other past storm. Are they in the business or warning or ratings? Make up your minds people!

I remember how worked up my grandmother used to get. She lived in northern Iowa (tornado alley) in a retirement home with no basement. Finally we told her, "Grandma, quit watching the Weather Channel. Just watch the local crawls." She did and she calmed down. She told her neighbors, they told their children and so on. 

I'm not just whining to you, dear readers, I'm contacting the Weather Channel. I've had enough. I'm boycotting the station as of today. I switched on our local news the other day when the weather was wild and the weather gal, Leeann was calm and reassuring. She talked safety precautions and the like in simple, unaffected language. She DID NOT yell, screech, hyperventilate (maybe she breathed a little fast and swallowed a few times, it was overwhelming weather) or jump up and down.

The gal today, on the Weather Channel went on and on about the TOR:CON index that some yahoo at the Weather Channel made up to try to "make book" on the likelihood of tornado development. Personally, I think he wanted to leave his footprint Fujita-style and the TV execs liked the idea of the index coming from their station exclusively. When it comes to weather and warnings NOTHING should EVER be exclusive.

I've advised my son with special needs to watch locally or turn on the NOAA weather radio. For radar we use our computers and the local stations. We don't watch the Weather Channel anymore. They can go fly a kite, preferably in a lightening storm. Of course, then they could lay exclusivity claims on electricity. Honestly!

Well, I'm done with my rant. Off to the Weather Channel to complain.

Hasta la vista baby!

Much love and joy ... and safety today.

Karen

Christmas Shopping in July

Hello everyone,

I'm feeling that weird Friday mixture of wanting to plan a fun and crazy weekend and being too pooped to consider the grocery store. You know the feeling, don't you?

It's supposed to be rainy on and off this weekend so I thought maybe we should have pizza and video night. Always a hit. I purchased the Toy Story 3 Wii game for Ryan for Christmas (yes, I am one of those people) but now I realize we'll have to try it to make sure it works because by Christmas they won't take it back if it doesn't. I don't blame them for that. So, tell me, how do you let him try it, make sure it works then take it back to wrap for Christmas? The answer: You don't. Nuts. Down one present.

I love Christmas shopping all year long. I don't feel pushed, I can wait for sales, I have a lot of selection ... there are too many benefits to name. I save some types of shopping for the season like wrapping paper and bows, stocking stuffers, little thinking of you type gifts but the bulk of mine is done by Halloween or Thanksgiving at the latest. Except for Cyber Monday, that is.

I LOVE Cyber Monday. While all these nuts are out on Black Friday standing in mega lines and fighting for electronics I happily sipping my morning coffee and reading the paper. Come Monday morning I get up early and start my computer. While it's booting up I pad into the kitchen where I make coffee and a bagel. I let out the dog and head back to my office. The dinging starts.

DING Buy! Lands End! 50% off apparel!  DING Amazon has half price Spiderman Wii games for the next hour DING JC Penny has 30% off all pajamas, DING ... e-mails flood into my box, chasing after my business and everyone has free shipping. I slide my feet into my fuzzy slippers and take a sip of my coffee. DING Electronics Mega Sale DING ... By noon, I'm done. All morning I sat in my PJs relaxing and finishing my shopping.

A friend brags about a TV she got at WalMart on Black Friday (after standing in the freezing in the predawn hours) I didn't have the heart to tell her it was $30 less on-line on Monday. Another friend lamented that I'd missed all the good deals that she got at Best Buy on music. I smiled and congratulated her, mine cost the same and are winging their way from Amazon as we speak, but I say nothing.

Cyber Monday rocks. Instead of me working to give away my money, THEY solicit ME. I like it!

So, you don't have to shop in July, but do shop Cyber Monday. Just remember that you're putting things on a credit card. Only spend what you can pay off or it's not a sale item, is it? Or use a debit card.

Have a great day.
Much love and joy,
Karen

Beauty in the Storm

Good morning, everyone!

It's a crisp after-the-storm type morning. We rocked and rolled a little last night, but nothing dangerous for us. Some areas had significant winds, hail and even tornadoes. At one point, however, near sunset, the whole world turned a beautiful orangey peach. I took some shot for you.

 I have a couple more to show you ... I wish I had a camera that could have truly caught the light because it was staggering how gorgeous it was.

Look at the clouds to the left, the whole sky was bubbled with them right along side the deeply sinister dark ones. Magnificent. I took photos until it got too dark. I am so awed by God in these moments, you know? It's hard to wrap my head around it all. Instead, I just enjoy.

How are you this fine morning? I've got a ton of work today so I'd dancing around it like it's on fire. So hard to be self-employed sometimes. I just want to play everyday and that's NOT how it works. I can flex my schedule but I still have to work.

I just wanted to share these photos with you. I'll make a point tomorrow! Take care of you ... may you find the beauty in every storm.

Much love and joy,

Karen

Are you my mother?

Ryan loves taking pics of storm clouds. He also loves thunderstorms. Since the movie Twister came out, he's loved to watch it during storms. I don't know if he's terrified of tornadoes and processing, or just going for a Surround Sound and 3D effect. What a kid! Fortunately, we don't get much for severe storms here so we're lucky. I have family in southern Minnesota and all over Iowa. THEY get storms. The F5 tornado that ripped with a couple of small towns in Iowa a couple of years ago was about five miles from my aunt's home she said. Yikes! Too close for me, my friends.

My father used to go outside during storms. It was almost impossible to keep him inside. He was a scientist and loved to feel the weather on his skin. I wonder if Ryan inherited some of that and it's manifesting traits in a different way. We still see traits of grandparents and parents in our children, even though you have to peer through the disabilities to see them. I know that Ryan likes to hear if he does something like someone else. Family connectedness is so important when it seems like all people ever see is what you can or cannot do. It's nice to hear, "Your uncle Dave used to do that too!"

This week, I promise to notice all the wonderful little things Ryan does like family. I will sit down with him and talk about how he is connected to our family and how he fits in so perfectly. Even if you are adopted you take on traits of your adoptive family so this doesn't leave you out either. Just make sure to make your comments positive. I know I will.

God bless,
Much love and joy,
Karen

Hey, I know why I'm tired!

Good morning,

I thought I'd show you a gorgeous plant from the greenhouse, horticultural therapy you know. I love wandering through greenhouses, smelling the flowers, taking photos of the blooms, feeling the leaves. It's therapy for both Ryan and me, one that I believe works wonders for most folks.

I know I've chatted about it before but it turns out there's a reason I crave being outside so much. I have SAD. I mean LITERALLY, not just a self proclaimed version (or aversion) in winter. Seasonal Affective Disorder isn't about depression for me at all. It's about hibernation. When others are getting excited for fall I'm sinking slowly, yawning, going to bed with the chickens and finding it a struggled to be up. This starts in ... are you ready? August. Yep. I sink more and more each day, struggling to find energy.

Along about January, when others are saying they have SAD, I'm starting to perk up. According to my rhematologist, I'm describing real SAD. Not only that, there's sometimes a biological reason for it. Right now, in the middle of summer, when I'm getting mega sunshine and the days are long, they tested my Vitamin D. And I am LOW. I start on 50,000 IU of prescription Vitamin D, one pill a week for 8 weeks. That's a LOT of D (Usually people who are deficient take about 1000 IU per day).

Interestingly enough, research is starting to show Vitamin D as a possible treatment or cure for OA. Hmmm. I had to have my hip replaced due to OA. Vitamin D is supposed to help those with the cartilage wear kind of OA the most. Hey, that's me too! I'm thinking ... what if Vitamin D cures me! Or at least treats me!  It's such a simple fix.

I can't wait to see if I have more energy this fall! Pray for a good ending for this for me. I'd love to have this work beautifully!

Take care of you and your special someone and may God bless you richly,

Much love and joy,
Karen

Manic Monday or a Relaxing Day Fishing

Good morning!

How are you? I'm feeling better this morning. I listened to a wonderful speaker last night and it brought me right out of my funk. Actually, prayer did that and this guy just affirmed it all for me.

Isn't my puff ball plant cute? I love it! It's heat resistant too so I'm happy with that since it's on my side patio. Now, if I can just remember what it's called! I always start the summer by hanging on to those little plastic designation sticks then I get sick of looking at them and pitch them. Then I wish I had them again. After that I figure I'll recognize them each year anyway.

Nothing has changed on Ryan's mess yet. I wrote the e-mails and hopefully today will bring some closure to the situation. I'm trying not to think about it or stress about it. It's on someone else's desk now. I do have some paperwork to do to get ready for a phone call later but that minimal if it solves some of these issues.

This morning was actually cool enough for a light weight blanket. Weird. It's been so warm and toasty lately.  Crawling back in really sounds good! BUT that's just asking for insomnia tonight! Ryan has started sleeping until 8:00 or 8:30 for the first time in his life. That's sleeping in for him. We get an occasional 9:00 but mainly he's up by 7:00 without fail, full of energy and ready to tackle the world again. I am humbled by that type of optimism and strength.

I should clean my house today but I may take Ryan fishing instead. I thought about some therapeutic scrapbooking with him but the day is perfect to spend near the water. hmmmm.

Whatever you do today, have an awesome one.
Take care of you and your special someone,
Much love and joy,

Karen

Talk to you soon,
Much love and joy,
Karen

A Down Day

I'm feeling overwhelmed today by Ryan's adult services. I don't mind all the paperwork, or even the hoops they make you jump through. I hate it when there are inaccuracies and mistakes on their part and Ryan pays the price. It breaks my heart. To say nothing of the amount of stress I feel when something doesn't get done the way it was supposed to, or the way they said it would.

I have a gift for organization, I'm a real organization junkie, and I'd like to flow chart their entire operation for them. They change rules constantly, which is OK, just NOT in the middle of a project. And so, today, Sunday, a day of rest, I get to deal with writing e-mails that will be in e-mail boxes on Monday morning. I WANT to play with Ryan. I hate taking time from him to mess around with this stuff when it should've been handled correctly in the first place. ERG!!

It's a down day for me people. I usually pretty positive but today is a day when the crud that we all deal with each and every day is getting to me. I pray that your day is full of joy, restoration and peace. I'm handing this particular situation to God. He can handle it better than I can.

Much love and joy,

Karen

Waiting for the Dentist

Here's Ryan waiting at the dentist. We've been taking him since he was three years old, twice each year. He's done well with it, never had an problems with sensory issues which was a total surprise to me. The adjustment was on the part of the dentist for his hearing aids. We'd forget about them then startle, "Oh, wait! His hearing aids!" The dentist would jump. But the thing is ... do you know what a cleaning tool sounds like in your mouth when it's amplified? Yeah, we didn't want to find out either.

As Ryan gets older it harder to regulate sweet snacks. He's a real cookie monster! I've decided that I'll stick fast to some rules.

• Brush in the morning and at bedtime with Soniccare toothbrush
• Eat at least three apples a week (nature's toothbrush)
• Drink milk with meals at home (he likes milk so that's easy)
• See the dentist twice each year
• Make the next dentist visit before we leave the current one.
• Floss, floss, floss (In our family gum issues are more a threat than teeth issues)

All in all it has gone great. He's twenty years old with no cavities. He's been able to get molars sealed as needed and has done well with the Soniccare toothbrush (which I highly recommend). It actually has a sensory stimulation benefit like surgical brushing. I suggest you get the timed version. It runs for two minutes but breaks for a beat every half minute so you can go to the next "quadrant" of the mouth. If you teach your child to brush in the same order each time they have no problems following that after they've got it.

Ryan needs to get his wisdom teeth cut out next year and I'm paying for that out of pocket. Either he goes in and gets each tooth cut out separately with Novocaine which is what MA pays for or I take him to a dental surgeon and get him put to sleep and all cut out at once. It's worth the $1500 to get it all done at once. Regular insurance pays for it that way, why does MA put people with disabilities through that?! By the time it's done it's the same amount of money to them?  But I digress ... dental preventative care is our theme here.

I think starting them young is the key. Maybe these suggestions won't work for everyone but maybe they'll work for someone.

Have a great Saturday,

Much love and joy,

Karen

No Bugs at the Outdoor Theater!

We went to the Outdoor Theater last night and I'm EXHAUSTED. I can't handle those late nights anymore, I'm such a wiener. Evening activities just totally wipe me out for the next day. Part of my "crud" I guess but annoying nonetheless!

We saw Toy Story 3, which was fun! There weren't a ton of people there because the fair is in town so many had gone to that. We'd already gone to the fair on Wednesday and deliberately chose last night. The weather was perfect!

We could have our window open the entire time.

We had purchased an OFF! clip on and put it on the dash. It has a little battery operated fan and we sat in bug-free comfort. Everyone else was swatting and spraying themselves big time. Bottom line ... I recommend the OFF! Clip On. I couldn't detect an odor. Read the directions though. It says you shouldn't have it around food.

Speaking of food.

The popcorn was typical theater fare but yummy anyway. I didn't eat dinner so popcorn was my entree! I overdosed on hotdogs when I was in college and haven't been able to eat them since so anything other than popcorn was out of the question.

Yep, I had caffeine too! What a mistake! Between the Dr. Pepper's effects and my hip  being sore from sitting in the car so long it took me forever to settle down once I got home. In the wee hours of the morning I finally dropped off. So today, I'm Zombie-ville Arizona!

Ryan and I had a great time though! We sat in bug-free, gorgeous July weather watching a great movie. It's the kind of night memories when memories are made. Hints for the future ... bring the Gameboy next time. Box office opened at 7:30 so we went at 8:30 to get a decent spot (we like to use the old fashioned speakers instead of the radio to get the full effect.)

They've done some work on those speakers. They were pretty good ... relatively. All the poles are tipped this way and that from people driving off and forgetting to hang them up. What a hoot!

Anyway, the movie started around 9:45. Some neanderthal in a wide body, extended cab pickup pulled in so close to us that Ryan couldn't have gotten out of his door if he would have wanted to. Honestly! Some people's kids. In all fairness, though, I parked a little distance from our speaker so I could get out with my crutches so I wasn't blameless.

I'm rambling so I'll depart now. Take your special person to the drive in this weekend. It shouldn't be too busy with the fair on in Chippewa. There must have been only about fifty cars when the movie started. Nearly all the teens were at the fair and the rest of us there were primarily families.

Have a good time!

Much love and joy,

Karen

Assistive Memory Device

Hi everyone!

Here's Ryan at the fair with his Gold and Plumb chicken visor. The kid is SUCH a tourist. Camera around the neck, sunglasses in hand, he's ready to enjoy the day.

We ate our way through the fair. Ryan insisted on his annual mega-cookie.

By the time he's done, he's covered in chocolate.

It was insanely hot and we only stayed about two and a half or three hours. One of the buildings felt like the heat was on and after we toured that one we declined rapidly!

I didn't take a ton of pics because we end up with some of the same stuff every year. Ryan is adamant that we log and document his experiences. I wondered why it was so important when he was younger, then I finally realized that his memory sometimes prevented him from remembering everything he wanted to about experiences that had a lot of visual input. He needed the documentation as an assistive memory device. (We also talk about that in Therapeutic Scrapbooking). He needed to remember what happened and have proof that he was there. Sometimes I wonder if it was a blurring of fantasy and reality. Was I there or did I imagine it?

We all forget things and that's something I make sure he understands. We remember generalizations like "We went to the fair, it was hot, we ate junk food, we had a good time, we saw people we hadn't seen in a while." Those are things Ryan remembers too. BUT, and here's the kicker, I can think back and visualize the fair. I don't think he can retrieve that memory picture so he depends on the actual photo.

At any rate, the day is getting away from me. I need to get back to my real life!

God bless you and yours,

Much love and joy,

Karen

Let's go to the fair!

Okay, so sue me. I overcompensate. What do I mean? I mean that I overindulge my son with special needs. Take for example, the fair. It's always a million degrees, with humidity in the eleventy hundreds and we head out to walk the midway in the blinding sun. Why? Because Ryan loves it. I mean he REALLY loves it.

I do too, but I'd rather go at night while it's cooler,  but it's a little too crowded then for us. So here I go. High temps today will touch 90, dewpoints are around 72 (they were 75 in Prairie du Chein yesterday) I'm surprised we haven't had any tornadys twisting around during the night hours.

At any rate, if you ride paddleboats in the rain, walk fairs during the heat of the day, or watch fireworks in the mosquito laden mist all because your special person is totally enthralled by it all ... you're not alone! I'm here with you!

They ask for so little, how can we refuse? They force us to live in the moment and never forget the wonder of a child, free from jaded cynicism. So I say .... grab the sunscreen and bug dope! Let's go to the fair!

Much love and joy,

Karen 

Therapeutic Scrapbooking and Massage

Ryan does a lot of experimenting with photos and this is his "self-portrait." Maybe he should be shooting masthead for Volume One, huh? Too funny!

It's another rainy, humid, buggy day. So ... I'm doing some therapeutic scrapbooking with Ryan. I love scrapbooking and therapeutic scrapbooking is just an extension of that. If you're interesting in holding a class to teach parents how to therapeutically scrap with their children, please let me know.

We're working on a couple of pages that deal with some pretty tough stuff but afterwards Ryan has a massage scheduled so he'll get to loosen up those muscles and relax. We've been going to Sans Souci massage here in Eau Claire and so far we've been very happy. Make an appointment and tell them I sent you!

We're massaging the spirit, then the body today! It's all about health, isn't it? Being the best our kids can be.

Well, the day begins. The fair is this week and we're trying to time our visit with the draft horse competition, our fav. Naturally we end up covered in dust.

See you tomorrow,

Much love and joy,

Karen

Moss Rose Children

This is one of my pots of Moss Roses. I love the way each plant has up to five or six different colors. And these are still babies!

I know I liken our situations to nature a lot but I'm a nature lover so analogies flow freely, you know? I look at the Moss Rose and it looks spiky and unassuming, like our kids. It grows in less than ideal environs, like our kids. It flourishes and blooms in amazing colors when hit with intense heat ... like our kids.

I love that our children are so resilient and full of grace. In similar circumstances I don't know that I would be so gracious. What about you? I get angry as a parent when I see things handled badly. Ryan's name got left out of the church directory and I'm sick to my stomach. It's a small thing but why is it always him? At least it seems to be. One other child I know was left out too and it makes me want to scream. I take solace, however, in the Bible verse that in heaven "the last shall be first." It's Ryan's confirmation verse and he believes it with all his heart. I ask God daily to help me believe it.

I pray that you deal with injustice and social slights today with grace and faith.

We'll see you tomorrow,

Much love and joy,

Karen